Smith Convinces Parker To Fight With Sandpaper Gloves

Joseph Parker has made some huge changes just days out from his fight with Joshua Anthony. The Fijian fighter has fired his trainer and financial manager Kevin Barry and has chosen to enlist the services of former Australian cricket players Steve Smith and David Warner.

Parker told Thai Castle “Yeah gee, just needed some fresh blood in the camp aye. I have always loved Smith and Warne-o simply had to hire them when I heard they were available.

Steve Smith was asked what his strategy was ahead of the fight to which he simply stated “Mate, our strategy involves lots of fucking sandpaper and copius amounts of ball tampering. This Joshua Anthony fella is gonna get sanded down!”

David Warner did not say anything as he is still learning to speak and read but has gone to work quickly creating Parkers new gloves which are completely made out of sandpaper and has also recommended that Parker use a machete in the ring as well.

Parker is excited about the fight and his chances saying “Yeah gee, I reckon I will win. These boys are innovative and do whatever it takes to win. This is what I am all about! Sandpaper and machetes”

Outside the ring Parker has also enlisted Lou Vincent to be his financial manager. Vincent has secured Parker a lucrative contract with Bunnings Warehouse and the TAB. Vincent stated that his financial strategy for this weeks fight will focus around investing all of Parkers money into the TAB this weekend.

Joshua Anthony has not commented on the changes and has instead focussed his energy on not exercising,eating Burger King, watching NZ version of Married at First Sight on repeat and staying up late on Chat Roulette.

 

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