Black Caps hire cat as new bowling coach

In what has been described as a “bold and risky” move by Donald Trump, the Blackcaps have fired Shane Jurgensen and replaced him with a cat named Trixie.

It was on a recent trip to India that coach Mike Hesson came up with the idea and after pondering it for a few months he has implemented the change. It was suggested that his behaviour during the trip was abnormal as he discovered many forms of mindfulness.

“One morning on tour we found Mike meditating with a spiritual leader and then another he was chewing the ear off a yoga instructor, I could tell he was talking about something serious, but few thought it was about the benefits of bringing a cat into the coaching squad”

When approached for comment by Thai Castle, Mike told us the following:

“The game is evolving at a rapid pace and there is plenty of focus on the minds of the players, basically ensuring their mental state is where it should be at the top of the run up right up until the delivery. If I can have my players interreacting with a cat during warm ups and gameday then I know they will be far more relaxed and at ease without being worried about a verbal spray from the bowling coach, it’s more of a mindfulness thing than anything else”.

As we left the grounds, Trixie meowed a few times, and then coughed up a furball into Trent Boults left boot.

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