Chris Cairns, packaged fudge mogul, has spent last night consoling Novak Djokovic after his shock early exit from the Australian Open.
The pair appeared flush with cash, hitting up Crown Casino and then blowing over $250k on models and bottles at exclusive night clubs in Melbourne town.
Cairns, who was found absolutely not guilty of match fixing in 2013, has befriended Djokovic over the past year bonding over their mutual love of sports and money.
Denis “The Menace” Istomin could not believe his own skills after toppling Djokovic. “If I were a betting man, I would have backed Djokovic last night. This was a pretty tough pick. Thankfully I’m not, so I saved myself some serious cash”.
Thai Castle understands that Cairns will be returning to New Zealand next month to start a new DVD rental business, with five stores initially opening across Auckland. While his accountants are skeptical about the amount of money going through the till already, Cairns insists “there’s nothing wrong with it”.