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Ryan Hoffman In Hospital After Kava Overdose

Warriors captain Ryan Hoffman was admitted to Manukau Hospital this morning after overdosing on kava.

Hoffman went to a Kava ceremony last night at Solomone Kata Dad’s garage in Papakura. The ceremony contained many Warriors players and other celebrities such as Paul Henry, Lorde and Eliza McCartney’s cousin McKenzie.

Warrior’s star Manu Vatuvei also at the ceremony told Thai Castle “Yeah Cappy Hoffman has really been getting into the Kava lately aye. After last season he rounded up the boiz and told us he wants to become part of the Islander culture. The guy has been taken intensive Tongan and Samoan lessons for weeks now and is throwing way more flick passes at training. He has even moved out to Manurewa and makes a mean chop suey and Povi Masima. He has also been really big into the Kava lately too but last night, he bit of more than he could chew… or should I say drank more than he could drank. Yeah you know what I mean.

Solomone Kata also at the event told Thai Castle “Yeah Cappy Hoffman instead of drinking out of his designated bowl skulled back the whole container of Kava. He just grabbed the bucket said “Maloleilei For Da Bradaz” and downed it. He was all good for 20 minutes or so then he just passed out. We called the ambulance and they swiftly picked him up 2 hours later.”

Hoffman is expected to make a swift recovery and is reportedly gutted to be missing his Tongan Language Lesson this evening.

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17 Comments on Ryan Hoffman In Hospital After Kava Overdose

  1. Thai Castle – this story is rubbish and shame on you for creating it. What is the purpose, the surrounding advertising? Kava is the indigenous substance and traditional icon of identity for Pasifika people. Your immature story belittles our icon and suggests it is not safe. If people reading this want the facts on kava, please read the 2016 World Health Orgainsation report – http://www.fao.org/3/a-i5770e.pdf

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  2. “We only report on *facts* and all we know is he was drinking kava all night and ended up in hospital.” But your headline “..IN HOSPITAL AFTER KAVA OVERDOSE” does not appear to be fact considering you state in your reply that “Perhaps someone spiked Ryans Kava?”. What was it, spike of overdose? The research and literature (eg. WHO report) says kava is safe and unlike alcohol, is very difficult to overdose on. We are concerned that our traditional drink is being misrepresented by this article. KB

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    • Ahh yes have just spoken to the doctors and surgeon and it is confirmed the kava was spiked. Looks like we got it wrong on this occasion. Apologies to you and your traditional drink. If you ever stop by the restaurant we would love to offer you 1 free Pad Thai

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  3. Where is Manukau Hospital??????

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  4. How did he get spiked every one else drink out of it.

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  5. “The rise and rise of fake news”

    “But why go to such trouble? The answer is there is big money to be made…”

    http://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-trending-37846860

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  6. Lmao Hahahahah fuck this is funny as!!!

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  7. Hahaha teka stories all over the show lol

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  8. have you guys not heard of “taking the piss”??? have a laugh mate. why so serious???

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  9. Hey Kava Boy, Calm the fuck down you loser.

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  10. Fuck off KavaGorilla.. oops, I mean KavaGirl.

    This story is so fake. Fuck Thaicastle1 too. Your stories are as fake as the meat you put in your dishes *cough* cat *cough*

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  11. Please kava is much more safer to drink rather then drinking alcohol and plus it’s our traditional drink not like alcohol where you go can’t even feel urself when you go drunk….sooo,get a grip of urself kavagirl

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  12. I fink u just blew Ryan Hoffman’s kava

    Like

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